The 8 to 1 Rule

 

Business studies show that there is an average of 8 negative complaints to every 1 compliment.  This is known as "the 8 to 1 Rule". 

    It tends to be human nature to complain. Sometimes complaints are constructive.  You want to let a restaurant know if you have gotten sick eating there.  You want a store to know if they have a rude employee.   But complaining just to complain is never helpful.  Negativity has a lot of power. 

    If you criticize a young artist, even in the area of "helping", you might just stop that young one's art forever.  Without intending to you have silenced that artist's voice.  Where's the benefit in that. 

    I once hear a story of a young artist who painted the mountains in his art class a maroon color.  His art teacher, of course, told him that mountains were not maroon.  They were green or brown or snow capped.  That "help" from the teacher stopped his painting.  Years later in New Mexico, he was sitting with a friend watching a sunset reflect along the mountain range.  Guess what color they turned out to be at one point.  That's right - maroon.

 When you are trying something new creatively, you will find that you are sensitive to other's comments.  You may have created a wonderful arrangement of things and with one well intended statement from a friend or family member; you now doubt your creation and your ability.

 These well intended statements are real sneaky in form.  They may start out with words such as "Don't you think it would be better if...." or "Maybe you should do this or that" or "Have you thought about...”   Often times you have not asked for a critique, or advice, or suggestions.  You have just shown what you have created.

Sometimes you may even find someone who takes the complaint into action and may add some color here or there or rearrange this piece and that piece or rewrites your essay or poem.  Now these folks do not see what they have said or done as criticism or a complaint or even negative.  They are just trying to help.  They want you to succeed and for your creation to look wonderful. 

They just don't see that their help has undermined what you have done.  They can't see your creation from your eyes.  They just see how they would do it.  They didn't see how much you worked on it with possibly sweat and tears.  They may not understand how much your creation is part of you.  To them, it is just an arrangement of things, be they words, colors, or knickknacks.

As you explore your creativity, be sensitive to the creativity and creations of others.  Change your "8 to 1 rule" to be 8 compliments to every 1 complaint.  Don't offer suggestions.  Find something positive to say about it:  "Oh, that is so you." or "I like this or that." or "I would love to see maroon mountains." (you might get an offer of a trip to New Mexico for that one). 

And for goodness sake, don't break one of my mother's rules: "If it is not yours, leave it where it is."  Don't add paint or correct grammar or move one piece of anything.  It is not your creation; so show it the respect you would want your art to receive.

 

© 2016, 2023 – Cheryl Fillion

 

Clutter

My house is cluttered.  Not really dirty but just cluttered.  I have piles or boxes or bags with projects in them everywhere. A friend once came to my house and while looking around my living room, I said “Welcome to the Heartfully Cheryl Manufacturing Center”.  I wanted her to know there was a reason for all the clutter (and why she couldn’t sit on my couch) and it wasn’t that I wasn’t a good housekeeper. 

I am one of those people who have several different projects going on at once.  In fact behind me right now. laying across my sewing machine. is a pair of slacks I am about to finish but I also need to get this blog written.  Usually I don’t mind the clutter and I am able to move from project to project.  But once in a while, I just have to straighten up.

I read all these articles and blogs about how cleaning up the clutter helps calm the nerves and helps focus the mind.  I can see how that would be.  There are times when I am looking for a particular tool and can’t find it where it usually is because it is stored with a project where it is being used.  And I do spend (or maybe waste) time hunting for it.

I read in these articles that cleaning the clutter helps allow in new things.  Not sure I need anything new but I get the point.  So once in a while I go through my projects and supplies and see if there is anything I need to discard.

One of the things I do with my fabric is sort out the scraps.  To me that is anything smaller than a fat quarter(an 18 x 22 inch of fabric).  These scraps I cut into various sized squares; anything from 2” to 6”.  I then put them in boxes dedicated to the individual size square.  This has become useful when doing a project that requires a certain size. I have the squares cut and ready to use.  Or if I just need a scrap of some green for an appliquéd leaf I go to my box of squares and usually find what I need.  I don’t have to sort through yards of fabric.

Another thing I have started to do is dedicated a certain amount of time cleaning one area of my work room.  I can do anything for 15 or 30 minutes and it usually takes a big chunk out of my clutter. 

So you might be asking what I do with the clutter I am eliminating.  I usually see if someone else wants it.  At our Fiber Artist group we have a monthly raffle.  Bring something you are no longer going to use and put it on the table.  If someone wants it they will buy a raffle ticket and maybe win it.  The money goes into our general fund.  The one problem with that is while you are getting rid of your clutter, you might end up winning someone else’s clutter. 

Another thing I do is donate it.  Our guild has a section of our quilt show set aside for basically a garage sale.  You as a member donate fabric, books, tools, even some handmade items to the guild and they sell it during the show bringing in money to get the type of programs the members want.

Now if you don’t have a fiber artist raffle or quilt show garage sale, why not donate your clutter to Goodwill or the Salvation Army.  The money from their thrift stores help run their programs.  Or if it is general crafts items, donate it to a school or day care for the children to use.  It helps their budget. 

See if a friend just starting out in crafts like quilting could use your scraps.  I gave some of my 6” squares to a friend who just wanted to make a scrap quilt but didn’t have a lot of money to buy yards of fabric.  Or maybe give it to a mother with young children who need some crafts to keep them busy during the summer.  When I started to do the kid’s crafts at the farmers market, I asked my quilt guild for empty thread spools for a project and the guild members not only gave me spools but any other craft supplies they had but didn’t want to help out with the crafts I was planning.  I didn’t have to buy anything that first year of crafts.

So whether you are cleaning out your clutter for peace of mind, to bring in new things or to keep your house off one of those hoarding television shows you see on cable TV, there are places to send your items other than the city dump.  And who knows maybe in cleaning out your work room (or your Manufacturing Center), you may find a special treasure you forgot you had under all that clutter (like a couch. haha). 

 

©2019,2023 - Cheryl Fillion