The 8 to 1 Rule

 

Business studies show that there is an average of 8 negative complaints to every 1 compliment.  This is known as "the 8 to 1 Rule". 

    It tends to be human nature to complain. Sometimes complaints are constructive.  You want to let a restaurant know if you have gotten sick eating there.  You want a store to know if they have a rude employee.   But complaining just to complain is never helpful.  Negativity has a lot of power. 

    If you criticize a young artist, even in the area of "helping", you might just stop that young one's art forever.  Without intending to you have silenced that artist's voice.  Where's the benefit in that. 

    I once hear a story of a young artist who painted the mountains in his art class a maroon color.  His art teacher, of course, told him that mountains were not maroon.  They were green or brown or snow capped.  That "help" from the teacher stopped his painting.  Years later in New Mexico, he was sitting with a friend watching a sunset reflect along the mountain range.  Guess what color they turned out to be at one point.  That's right - maroon.

 When you are trying something new creatively, you will find that you are sensitive to other's comments.  You may have created a wonderful arrangement of things and with one well intended statement from a friend or family member; you now doubt your creation and your ability.

 These well intended statements are real sneaky in form.  They may start out with words such as "Don't you think it would be better if...." or "Maybe you should do this or that" or "Have you thought about...”   Often times you have not asked for a critique, or advice, or suggestions.  You have just shown what you have created.

Sometimes you may even find someone who takes the complaint into action and may add some color here or there or rearrange this piece and that piece or rewrites your essay or poem.  Now these folks do not see what they have said or done as criticism or a complaint or even negative.  They are just trying to help.  They want you to succeed and for your creation to look wonderful. 

They just don't see that their help has undermined what you have done.  They can't see your creation from your eyes.  They just see how they would do it.  They didn't see how much you worked on it with possibly sweat and tears.  They may not understand how much your creation is part of you.  To them, it is just an arrangement of things, be they words, colors, or knickknacks.

As you explore your creativity, be sensitive to the creativity and creations of others.  Change your "8 to 1 rule" to be 8 compliments to every 1 complaint.  Don't offer suggestions.  Find something positive to say about it:  "Oh, that is so you." or "I like this or that." or "I would love to see maroon mountains." (you might get an offer of a trip to New Mexico for that one). 

And for goodness sake, don't break one of my mother's rules: "If it is not yours, leave it where it is."  Don't add paint or correct grammar or move one piece of anything.  It is not your creation; so show it the respect you would want your art to receive.

 

© 2016, 2023 – Cheryl Fillion

 

Clutter

My house is cluttered.  Not really dirty but just cluttered.  I have piles or boxes or bags with projects in them everywhere. A friend once came to my house and while looking around my living room, I said “Welcome to the Heartfully Cheryl Manufacturing Center”.  I wanted her to know there was a reason for all the clutter (and why she couldn’t sit on my couch) and it wasn’t that I wasn’t a good housekeeper. 

I am one of those people who have several different projects going on at once.  In fact behind me right now. laying across my sewing machine. is a pair of slacks I am about to finish but I also need to get this blog written.  Usually I don’t mind the clutter and I am able to move from project to project.  But once in a while, I just have to straighten up.

I read all these articles and blogs about how cleaning up the clutter helps calm the nerves and helps focus the mind.  I can see how that would be.  There are times when I am looking for a particular tool and can’t find it where it usually is because it is stored with a project where it is being used.  And I do spend (or maybe waste) time hunting for it.

I read in these articles that cleaning the clutter helps allow in new things.  Not sure I need anything new but I get the point.  So once in a while I go through my projects and supplies and see if there is anything I need to discard.

One of the things I do with my fabric is sort out the scraps.  To me that is anything smaller than a fat quarter(an 18 x 22 inch of fabric).  These scraps I cut into various sized squares; anything from 2” to 6”.  I then put them in boxes dedicated to the individual size square.  This has become useful when doing a project that requires a certain size. I have the squares cut and ready to use.  Or if I just need a scrap of some green for an appliquéd leaf I go to my box of squares and usually find what I need.  I don’t have to sort through yards of fabric.

Another thing I have started to do is dedicated a certain amount of time cleaning one area of my work room.  I can do anything for 15 or 30 minutes and it usually takes a big chunk out of my clutter. 

So you might be asking what I do with the clutter I am eliminating.  I usually see if someone else wants it.  At our Fiber Artist group we have a monthly raffle.  Bring something you are no longer going to use and put it on the table.  If someone wants it they will buy a raffle ticket and maybe win it.  The money goes into our general fund.  The one problem with that is while you are getting rid of your clutter, you might end up winning someone else’s clutter. 

Another thing I do is donate it.  Our guild has a section of our quilt show set aside for basically a garage sale.  You as a member donate fabric, books, tools, even some handmade items to the guild and they sell it during the show bringing in money to get the type of programs the members want.

Now if you don’t have a fiber artist raffle or quilt show garage sale, why not donate your clutter to Goodwill or the Salvation Army.  The money from their thrift stores help run their programs.  Or if it is general crafts items, donate it to a school or day care for the children to use.  It helps their budget. 

See if a friend just starting out in crafts like quilting could use your scraps.  I gave some of my 6” squares to a friend who just wanted to make a scrap quilt but didn’t have a lot of money to buy yards of fabric.  Or maybe give it to a mother with young children who need some crafts to keep them busy during the summer.  When I started to do the kid’s crafts at the farmers market, I asked my quilt guild for empty thread spools for a project and the guild members not only gave me spools but any other craft supplies they had but didn’t want to help out with the crafts I was planning.  I didn’t have to buy anything that first year of crafts.

So whether you are cleaning out your clutter for peace of mind, to bring in new things or to keep your house off one of those hoarding television shows you see on cable TV, there are places to send your items other than the city dump.  And who knows maybe in cleaning out your work room (or your Manufacturing Center), you may find a special treasure you forgot you had under all that clutter (like a couch. haha). 

 

©2019,2023 - Cheryl Fillion

 

July’s Quirky Holidays

July has a lot of holidays.  Of course in the US, there is July 4^th, Independence Day when it was decided to separate from Britain and form our own nation.  That is a big summer celebration with picnics, parades and fireworks.  But there are a lot more reasons to celebrate in July, especially if a picnic on July 4^th isn’t enough.

There are all kinds of food “Days”.  July 1^st is Creative Ice Cream Flavors Day and International Chicken Wing Day. July 3^rd is Eat Beans Day.  Sidewalk Egg Frying Day is also on July 4^th (not sure I would want to eat that egg).  Do you like apple turnovers?  Well, have one on July 5^th, that is National Apple Turnover Day.  July 6^th is National Fried Chicken Day.  July 7^th is Chocolate Day, International Cherry Pit Spitting Day (got to eat the cherry to get the pit) and National Strawberry Sundae Day.  My favorite summer fruit – blueberries is honored on July 8^th.(and then Pick Blueberries Day is on the 10^th and National Blueberry Muffins Day is the 11^th)

July 10^th is National Sugar Cookie Day (and you could revisit the Chocolate Day and Strawberry Sundae Day by having aother sundae with a little chocolate syrup and a cookie).  Just to make sure we get in another dessert, Pecan Pie Day is July 12^th.  French Fries are honored on July 13^th (appropriate since French Bastille Day is the 14^th).  We go back to ice cream with National Ice Cream Day (different from July 1^st which is Creative Ice Cream Flavors Day, remember). Have some pudding on Tapioca Pudding Day on the 15^th.  And with all these sweets, eat some spinach on the 16^th for Fresh Spinach Day.

We do another flavor of ice cream on the 17^th for Peach Ice Cream Day.  And to get a little fancy, try some caviar on National Caviar Day on the 18^th but I wouldn’t combined it with the other food honored on that day, Hot Dogs.  And with all this food you do need a drink now and then, so for the adults try a Daiquiri on its day the 19^th. Cakes are also back on the 19^th with National Raspberry Cake Day.  The 20^th brings another ice cream day with National Ice Cream Soda day.  Don’t want anymore ice cream but you do want something sweet?  Switch the ice cream for a lollipop on the 20^th – it’s that sweet sucker’s national day. 

And so we don’t forget a favorite ‘unofficial’ food group, July 21^st is National Junk Food Day.  Remember with chips, you can’t eat just one.  July still hasn’t had enough of ice cream.  We have to honor the basic, vanilla on July 23rd. You don’t have to live south of the border to get some tequila on the 24^th.  That day is National Tequila Day.  The 28^th is a favorite of children of every age: National Milk Chocolate Day.

July 1^st was International Chicken Wing Day.  We also need to bring it home with National Chicken Wing Day on July 29^th.  If you want more of a meal, the 29^th is also National Lasagna Day.  And we finish off the food month with a sweetie on the 30^th, National Cheesecake Day. 

Now if you can’t find something to celebrate with food during the month of July, you are just too picky of an eater.  To the rest of us, I say “LET’S EAT!”

©2018, 2023 Cheryl Fillion